有格局的父亲是如何教育儿子的？英文双语对照

第一，团结教育：凝聚家庭合力。

“一母生九子，连母十个样”，一家人，个个都有个性，长相也不同，三观也不会一致。想要让孩子都“很听话”，似乎是做不到的。

看过这样一句话：“如果一个杯子有了缺口，你换一个角度看，仍旧是完美的。”

想要家庭团结，既要寻找缺点，更要取长补短，避免缺点。

作为父母，要懂得，兄弟姐妹能够走多远，有多大本事，关键看最弱的那个人。孩子围坐在一起，就像一个水桶一样，能装多少水，取决于最短的那块板子。

古时候，有一个可汗叫慕容阿柴，他临终前，把二十个儿子叫过来，让他们每人拿一支箭，然后让他们把箭合在一起，意味深长地说：“汝曹当戳力一心。”

把每个人的长处合在一起，又互相取长补短，这样的家庭，越来越强大，做任何事情，都分得清里外。

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第二，吃苦教育：珍惜当下的好生活。

《朱子家训》里写道：“一粥一饭当思来之不易，一丝一缕恒念物力维艰。”

好日子来之不易，作为父母，深有体会。但是儿女不一定懂得。

长期在城里生活的儿女，可能会认为，柴米油盐，都是从超市来的，根本不知道，种地有多辛苦，禾苗长在哪里。父母很有必要，加强这方面的教育。

后唐名将李存审经常对儿女们说：“我从小就离开了家乡，靠一把剑，混到了今天。生死攸关的时候，有一两回；但是中箭有一百多回。”

当儿女长大后，他把伤害过自己的箭，都拿出来，送给了儿女。

家庭的富贵，社会的安宁，需要很多人默默付出。在我们看不到的地方，有人站岗放哨，有人躬耕劳作。好日子来了，但是苦日子还要继续。

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第三，孝道教育：尊重长辈，传承家风。

在我们身边，经常发生这样的事情：父母年纪大了，走不动了，儿女们围坐在一起，商量如何赡养父母的问题。

总有一些儿女，会愤愤不平地说，当初他没有从大家庭得到好处，不应该孝顺父母；有儿女说，她是女孩，家里重男轻女，她不应该赡养父母；有儿女说，自家条件太差，没有能力赡养父母......

儿女把父母偏心，家庭条件，男孩女孩等，作为“不孝顺”的借口。事实上，父母是没有办法做到百分百公平的，关键是要舍去“攀比心”，把良心拾起来。

西汉初年，大臣淳于意违反了规定，应该被处以极刑。他的女儿缇萦修书一封，给了皇帝，说：“父亲一直廉洁守法，但是这一次，犯错误了。如果父亲被处以极刑，就没有改正的机会了。我愿意入宫做事，以此来为父亲承担责任，换取他一次改过的机会。”

于情于理，代替父母受过的人，应该是儿子，而不是女儿。但是缇萦却没有这样想。

儿女都是传后人、我们都是吃父母家的饭长大的，当我们这样思考的时候，心理就平衡了，就能真正做到“纯孝”了。反哺父母，是没有条件的，所有的理由，都是多余的。

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第四，廉洁教育：培养孩子的好品格。

隋朝时，大臣赵轨回到家，发现邻居家的桑树有一些枝丫伸到了自家的院子里，微风轻轻一吹，一些桑葚就掉落了。

赵轨把桑葚捡起来，送给邻居，并告诉儿女：“吾非以此求名，意者非机杼之物，不愿侵人。”

不是劳动所得，就不要去拿。这是做人最起码的原则。

平时生活中，父母常常会随手摘下路边的果实，拿起邻居家的劳动工具，顺走某些东西，无心之举，就会教坏有心之人。

教育儿女，要分得清“你的、我的、他的”。农村有句俗话：“小时候拿一根针，长大了变贼精。” 不要把一些顺手的小事，当成了儿戏，而是要认认真真对待，抓住机会，讲出道理。

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第五，独立教育：不留下大量钱财给孩子，逼着孩子靠自己。

看过这样一个观点：“兄弟姐妹吵闹不休，归根结底就是财富分配问题。”

“人为财死，鸟为食亡”，这是自然规律，但是人类的文明，可以改变规律。君子总是乐善好施，愿意把财富给别人，哪能把财富变成一座无形的牢笼呢？

西汉大臣疏广说过：“贤而多财，则损其志；愚而多财，则益其过。且夫富者，众人之怨也。”

贤惠的人，因为财富太多，会意志消沉，愚昧的人，因为财产太多，会犯错误。仇富的人，会和财产多的人做对。这就是父母不应该留下大量财产给儿女的真实理由。

授人以鱼，不如授人以渔。有格局的父母，会告诉儿女，如何去获取财富，如何发挥财富的作用，而不是留下钱财，给儿女享受荣华富贵。

The first, unitive education: Condense domestic join forces.

"One mother is strange 9 child, join a parent 10 appearance " , family, each individualizes, appearance is different also, 3 view also won't agree. Want to let the child " very obedient " , it is impracticable it seems that.

Had seen a such words: "If a cup had gap, you change an angle to look, still be perfect. Still be perfect..

Want domestic solidarity, want to search defect already, should learn from others's strong points to offset his weakness more, prevent defect.

As parents, want to know, brotherly sister can go much further, have how old skill, the key treats the weakest that individual. The child is surrounded sit together, resemble a pail same, can install how many water, depend on that the shortest bat.

In ancient time, a cham calls a surname A bavin, before he is mortal, call 20 sons, let them take an arrow each, let them add up to the arrow together next, say meaningfully: "Your Cao is become stamp strength at one. "Your Cao is become stamp strength at one..

Combine the advantage of everybody together, learn from others's strong points to offset his weakness each other again, such family, more and more powerful, do everything, share clear inside and outside.

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The 2nd, bear hardships education: The exceedingly that cherishs instantly is vivid.

" model of Home Zhu Zi " in write: "One meal should think of one congee hard-earned, an one detailed constant reads aloud difficult of material resources dimension. An one detailed constant reads aloud difficult of material resources dimension..

Wedding day hard-earned, as parents, have experience greatly. But children is not known certainly.

The children that lives for a long time in the city, may think, fuel, come from the supermarket, know far from, cultivate land has much trouble, seedings of cereal crops is long where be. Parents very be necessary, strengthen the education of this respect.

Careful of Li Cun of famous general of the Later Tang Dynasty often is opposite children people say: "I left home town as a child, rely on a sword, mixed today. Life-and-death when, have 9 times; But in the arrow has more than 100 times. But in the arrow has more than 100 times..

After children is grown, he crosses harm oneself arrow, take, sent children.

Domestic riches and honour, of the society quiet, need a lot of people to be paid silently. The place that be less than visits in us, somebody stands sentry stand sentry, somebody bend forward work n cultivated land. Wedding day came, but hard time continues even.

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The 3rd, yo of filial piety Taoism: Respect elder member of family, inheritance home wind.

Beside us, often produce such thing: Parental age is old, went to be not moved, children people surround sit together, discuss how to sufficient the problem of foster parent.

Always have a few children, meeting be indignant ground says, at the outset he did not get benefit from big family, not should filial parents; Children says, she is the girl, weigh in the home male light female, she should not sufficient foster parent; Children says, oneself condition is too poor, without competence support parents. . . . . .

Children parents prejudicial, domestic condition, boy girl waits, as " not filial " excuse. In fact, parents achieves hundred fairness without method, the key is to should be abandoned go " vie heart " , pick up conscience rise.

At the beginning of the Western Han Dynasty year, chancellery Chun Yuyi violated a regulation, should be in with the death penalty. His daughter oranges red encompass compiles a book, gave an emperor, say: "Father is clean-fingered all the time and abide by the law, but this, made a mistake. If father is in with the death penalty, the opportunity that did not correct. I am willing to work into palace, will assume responsibility for father with this, exchange the opportunity that he mends his ways. Exchange the opportunity that he mends his ways..

At affection at manage, displace the person that parents has gotten, should be a son, is not a daughter. But orange red encompass did not think so however.

Children is to pass later generations, we are to eat the meal of parental home to be brought up, when we think so, psychology was balanced, can accomplish truly " pure filial piety " . Feed back parents, do not have a condition, all reason, it is redundant.

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The 4th, clean-fingered education: Develop good quality and style of the child.

When Sui Chao, chancellery Zhao course returns the home, the mulberry that discovers neighbour home has a few residue in the courtyard that extended oneself, gentle breeze whiffet, a few mulberry dropped.

Zhao track comes mulberry pick up, send neighbour, tell young man and woman: "My blame seek a name with this, meaning person the content that is not machine reed, do not wish to invade a person. Do not wish to invade a person..

Not be labor income, be not taken. This is to be an upright person most the principle of at least.

In living at ordinary times, conveniently of constant regular meeting picks parents the fructification of next roadside, take the labor tool of neighbour home, arrange certain thing, lift involuntarily, can teach intentional person bad.

Educational children, should share clear " your, my, his " . The country has a common saying: "Take an injection in one's childhood, was brought up to change wicked essence. " the petty thing that does not want an a few convenient and easy to use, regarded as trifling matter, want to be treated seriously however, seize an opportunity, tell a truth.

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The 5th, independent education: Do not leave a large number of gold to give the child, forcing the child relies on him.

Had seen a such point of views: "Brotherly sister is clamorous endlessly, in the final analysis is fortune allocation problem. In the final analysis is fortune allocation problem..

"Factitious money is dead, the bird dies to feed " , this is the order of nature, but human civilization, can change the rule. Gentleman always is Le Shanhao apply, be willing to give others money, which can turn fortune into an aeriform cage?

Chancellery of the Western Han Dynasty is scanty wide had said: "Virtuous and much money, criterion caustic its annals; I and much money, criterion its pass increase. And the husband is rich person, the enmity of everybody also. The enmity of everybody also..

Virtuous person, because fortune is too much, the meeting is demoralized, ignorant person, because belongings is too much, can make a mistake. Chou Fu's person, the person with meeting and much property is done right. This is the real reason that parents should not leave a large number of belongings to give children.

Give a person with the fish, be inferior to giving a person with fishing. Have the father and mother of pattern, can tell young man and woman, how to go getting money, how to produce the effect of fortune, is not to keep money, enjoy a high position and great wealth to children.