中美家庭处于不同的文化环境中,因而受到不同文化价值观的影响,中美家庭所代表着不同的文化价值观。组成家庭的成员的个人的行为、观念由于受不同文化价值观影响必然不同。
一、婚姻观
婚姻关系是人际关系中最密切最长久的一种,是构成家庭的最基本的关系。
1、中国家庭价值观之婚姻观
中国是集体主义为核心价值观的文化群体,个人利益需要服从集体利益,注重培养和谐、宽容的人际关系,因此中国家庭成员的行为观念大多数是以家庭这个小集体的利益为中心。家庭对于夫妻双方来说是共同努力的方向和目标,是一切活动的中心。
总体看来中国的离婚率还是远远低于美国,因为中国人注重家庭这个集体的利益,婚姻已经不属于个人问题,它包含着道德、责任、荣誉感等因素。中国夫妻双方在考虑婚姻及家庭时大多数不会以个人的利益为重,这和美国家庭价值观大相径庭。
2、美国家庭价值观之婚姻观
美国是具有几百年历史的西方文化尤其是古希腊罗马文化的集大成者,由于不同的历史发展道路和不同的自然地理条件等因素,形成了与中国完全不同的文化价值观念。美国家庭价值观贯穿着独立、权利及平等三大观念。
美国人的天伦之乐的思想是以个人平等、独立发展和权利意识这些观念为基础的。其中最突出的观念是家庭成员之间的独立平等。这种家庭价值观和美国人的个人主义价值观是紧密相连、一脉相承的。
总体看来,美国人的婚姻观与中国人的婚姻观有着极大的不同。美国人认为:婚姻纯属个人私事,任何人没有权利干涉;同时婚姻与道德问题没有关系。一个人有权去选择自己所爱的人,结婚后一旦发现现有的婚姻是一个错误,不幸福的婚姻,自己有权做出再一次的选择。如果夫妇一方爱上了第三者,任何一方都不会受谴责。在他们看来:强迫两个不相爱的人生活在一起是残忍的。
因此,由于文化价值观的不同导致家庭价值观的不同,集体主义为核心价值观的中国家庭价值观和以个人主义为核心价值观的美国家庭价值观存在着很大的差异。在跨国婚姻中,这些问题是夫妻双方交际产生矛盾的根本原因。
二、教育方式
教育是文化的组成部分,受到文化的影响和制约。教育离不开文化传统,教育除了受一定社会的政治制度、经济发展的影响外,教育思想、教育制度、教育内容和方法无不留下文化传统的痕迹。
文化价值观作为文化的核心,对教育具有深远的影响作用。而教育的实施除了在学校规范的进行外,还有大部分时间教育的过程是在家庭这个情景中进行的,而能影响这个过程的主要因素便是父母。对于采取什么样的教育方式和情景,由于文化价值观的不同,中国父母和美国父母在教育方面存在着差异。
1、中国父母的教育方式
中国家庭价值观注重家庭这个集体的整体利益,由于中国一直受儒家思想和“三纲五常”的影响,在中国家庭中一直存在这父母与孩子之间的地位不平等的倾向。因此在做一些决定时,父母的决定更具有权威性。随着中国社会逐步进入经济社会时代,中国父母已经越来越重视孩子的教育问题,对孩子的知识教育投入了越来越多的精力。
孩子学业的成功与否已经不仅仅是关系到孩子前途的问题而且已经和家庭利益联系在一起,因为许多父母认为孩子的好成绩会增加自己的颜面,这无形给中国孩子增加了精神压力。评价一个孩子是否优秀,学习成绩是一个很重要的因素。
近来,对孩子的技能培养也成了中国家庭教育的一项重要内容,在知识教育的基础上,家长给孩子安排了各种技能培训,例如,钢琴、舞蹈、书法、棋类等技能培训也成了孩子教育的内容。选择这些技能,大多不是基于孩子的兴趣来选择的,而是从他们将来谋生的角度考虑由父母的意志来安排的。
对于孩子以后的人生道路,中国父母更多是采取包办式。对于孩子上什么学校、学什么专业、工作问题、甚至婚姻问题等,中国父母都是扮演着主要的角色。
2、美国父母的教育方式
以个人主义为中心的美国文化价值观,以个体的商业活动为经济基础,始终把“利”看作是健康的价值追求,因此它鼓励人们积极地追求现实利益,并在平等的基础上开展竞争,努力获取个人的最大利益和幸福。在美国,竞争意识渗透于整个社会乃至每个家庭。
因此在美国家庭价值观中,竞争意识也是一个很重要的方面。竞争才能进步,只有在竞争中才能充分展现出自己真正的能力。
要想在竞争中获胜,就必须具备在社会中顽强生活的实力,因为竞争是残酷无情的,只有不断的提高自己竞争的能力才能迎接各种挑战。
因此美国家长非常注重培养子女的各种社会适应能力。其中包括自理能力、自我选择能力、自我表现能力,而所有的这些能力是在竞争中不可缺少的。美国家长尊重、鼓励儿童“自我选择,自主负责”,因此在制定家庭教育的目标时,家长会充分尊重孩子的意愿。
关于择业和交友等问题上,父母会尊重孩子的意愿,最后由孩子来做最后的决定。
总而言之,不同的文化价值观对不同家庭教育目的形成产生着巨大影响。中美两国文化价值观的不同是导致形成不同家庭教育方式的原因。
中美文化的价值体系都把人放在中心位置上,但对人的理解却截然不同。美国文化强调人作为有理智、尊严和自由意志的独立个体的地位、要求人对自己的命运负责,一切靠自己,因而在处理家庭问题方面也必然体现出以个人主义为中心的观念。无论是在婚姻问题方面还是在对孩子的教育方式方面,他们都以个人的意志为中心。而中国文化则主要把人理解为类的存在物,重视人的社会价值,把人看做是群体的一份子,是他所属社会关系的派生物,个体的价值因群体而存在并借此体现。
Sino-US family is in different culture environment in, be differred consequently the influence of culture viewpoint of value, sino-US family place is representing different culture viewpoint of value. Because the behavior of the individual of the member that comprises a family, idea suffers influence of different culture viewpoint of value to differ necessarily.
One, marital view
Marital relation is human relation in the closest a the longest kind, it is the mainest concern that forms a family.
1, the marital view of Chinese family viewpoint of value
China is collectivistic the culture group that is core viewpoint of value, individual interest needs obedient and collective increase, pay attention to education harmony, good-tempered human relation, because this is medium,the behavior idea great majority of member of national law court is with the family the interest of this small collective is a center. The family is mixed to the direction that the joint efforts is for both sides of husband and wife target, it is the center of all activities.
Overall look Chinese divorce is led or far under the United States, because the Chinese pays attention to a family this collective interest, marriage has not attributed individual problem, it is containing the element such as morality, responsibility, honorary feeling. Both sides of Chinese husband and wife is considering the great majority when marriage and family to won't be attached most importance to with the individual's interest, this and viewpoint of value of beautiful state law court are widely divergent.
2, the marital view of American family viewpoint of value
The United States is the western culture that has hundreds of years of histories especially the be a comprehensive expression of of culture of ancient Greek Rome person, because different history develops the element such as road and different physical geography condition, formed the culture value sense that differs completely with China. 3 grand sight read aloud American family viewpoint of value is perforative independence, right and equality.
With individual equality, independent development and right consciousness these ideas are a foundation the thought of the family happiness of American. Among them the most outstanding idea is the independent equality between domestic member. The individualistic viewpoint of value of viewpoint of value of this kind of family and American is to be linked together cheek by jowl, of come down in one continuous line.
Overall look, the marital view of the marital view of American and Chinese is having huge to differ. American thinks: Marriage is pure belong to individual private affairs, anybody is non-privileged interference; At the same time marriage and moral problem did not concern. A person has authority to select the person that he loves, the once discover,has marriage after marrying is a mistake, not happy marriage, oneself have authority to make again choice. If connubial one party fell in love with a third party, any one party won't suffer condemnation. Look in them: Forcing two person lives that do not love each other is cruel together.
Accordingly, as a result of culture viewpoint of value different those who cause domestic viewpoint of value is different, collectivistic the Chinese family viewpoint of value that is core viewpoint of value and with individualistic the American family viewpoint of value that is core viewpoint of value is existing very big difference. In the marriage that cross a state, these problems are the prime cause with contradictory generation of intercourse of both sides of husband and wife.
2, educational means
Education is the component of culture, be mixed by the influence of culture restrict. Education cannot leave culture tradition, outside teaching the effect that develops besides the political system that gets certain society, economy, content of educational thought, system of education, education and methodological all without exception leave the mark of culture tradition.
Culture viewpoint of value serves as the core of culture, have far-reaching effect effect to education. And of education carry out undertake besides what learning school standard outside, the process that still has the education between greater part time-sharing is to be in what the family undertakes in this scene, and the main factor that can affect this process is parents. What kind of to adopting education means and scene, as a result of culture viewpoint of value different, chinese parents and American parents are existing in educational field difference.
1, the educational means of Chinese parents
Chinese family viewpoint of value pays attention to a family this collective whole interest, because China suffers all the time,Confucianism is mixed " 3 key link 5 constant " influence, put in the tendency of the positional imparity between this parents and child all the time in Chinese family. When making a few decisions accordingly, parental decision has authority more. Enter economic society period stage by stage as Chinese society, chinese parents has taken educational issue of the child seriously more and more, to the child's knowledge education threw more and more energy.
The success of child school work had been the problem that matters to child future not just and had contacted together with domestic interest, because a lot of parents think good achievement of the child can add his face, this is aeriform increased mental pressure to Chinese child. Evaluate a child outstanding, studying result is a very main factor.
Latter, to the child's skill education also became a when Chinese family teachs serious content, on the basics that teachs in knowledge, the parent arranged all sorts of skill to groom to the child, for example, piano, dancing, calligraphy, chess kind wait for skill to groom the content that also became child education. Choose these skill, mostly the interest that is based on the child does not choose, the angle that fends in the future from them however considers to be arranged by parental volition.
Road of the following to the child life, chinese parents more is to adopt monopolize type. Go up to the child what school, learn issue of what major, job, even marital problem, chinese parents is to acting main part.
2, the educational means of American parents
With individualistic the American culture viewpoint of value that is a center, it is economic base with individual commercial activity, from beginning to end " benefit " regard the value pursuit that is health, accordingly it encourages people actively to seek actual profit, begin competition on equal foundation, get an individual hard most golden eggs and happiness. Be in the United States, competitive consciousness is permeated at whole society and even every family.
Because this is in American family viewpoint of value, competitive consciousness also is a very important facet. Competitive ability progresses, the ability in competing only shows his true ability adequately.
Want to win victory in competition, with respect to the actual strength that must have tenacious in the society life, because competition is of brutal callosity, only the ceaseless capacity ability that enhances oneself to compete meets all sorts of challenges.
Because parent of this United States pays attention to education very much,all sorts of societies of children get used to ability. Include to provide for oneself among them ability, ego choice ability, self-expression ability, and all these ability are indispensable in competition. American parent esteem, encourage children " ego choice, be in charge of independently " , because this is when the target that makes domestic education, the parent can respect the child's desire adequately.
Mix about choose course of study hand in the problem such as friend to go up, parents can respect the child's desire, make final decision finally by the child.
Altogether, different culture viewpoint of value forms generation to wear to purpose of different family education tremendous influence. Of viewpoint of value of culture of Sino-US two countries differring is to cause the cause that forms different family to teach way.
The value system of Sino-US culture puts the person in the center locally, but disparate however to the person's understanding. American culture emphasizes a person serving as person of rational wisdom, dignity and freewill independent and individual position, requirement to be in charge of to his destiny, everything relies on oneself, in respect of processing family problem consequently inevitable also body is revealed with individualistic the idea that is a center. No matter be,still be in in marital problem respect the educational fashion field to the child, they are a center with the individual's volition. And Chinese culture basically understands the person for kind existence content, value social value of the person, the one member that the person regards as a group, it is the derive content that he belongs to human relations in society, individual value exists because of the group and borrow this to reflect.