英语笑话：stupid Criminals 愚蠢的罪犯

stupid Criminals

Kentucky:

Two men tried to pull the front off a cash machine by running a chain from the machine to the bumper of their pickup truck. Instead of pulling the front panel off the machine，though，they pulled the bumper off their truck. Scared，they left the scene and drove home. With the chain still attached to the machine. With their bumper still attached to the chain. With their vehicle’s license plate still attached to the bumper.

Virginia:

Two men in a pickup truck went to a new-home site to steal a refrigerator. Banging up walls，floors，etc.，they snatched a refrigerator from one of the houses，and loaded it onto the pickup. The truck promptly got stuck in the mud，so these brain surgeons decided that the refrigerator was too heavy. Banging up more walls，floors，etc.，they put the refrigerator back into the house，and returned to the pickup truck，only to realize that they locked the keys in the truck—so they abandoned it.

Location Unknown:

A man walked into a bank，put a $20 bill on the counter and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer，the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register，which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and fled—leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer？Fifteen dollars.

重点英语词汇：

1.Kentucky - 肯塔基州

2.cash machine - 自动取款机

3.chain - 链子

4.bumper - 汽车保险杠

5.pickup truck - 皮卡车

6.front panel - 前面板

7.scared - 害怕的

8.scene - 现场

9.license plate - 车牌

10.Virginia - 弗吉尼亚州

11.new-home site - 新房工地

12.snatched - 抢夺

13.mud - 泥泞

14.brain surgeons - 脑外科医生（讽刺地指代“聪明人”）

15.walls - 墙壁

16.floors - 地板

17.loaded - 装载

18.stuck - 陷入

19.abandoned - 遗弃

20.bank - 银行

21.counter - 柜台

22.change - 零钱

23.cash drawer - 现金抽屉

24.gun - 枪

25.register - 收银机

26.clerk - 职员

27.provided - 提供

28.fled - 逃跑

29.total amount - 总金额

30.drawer - 抽屉

愚蠢的罪犯

肯塔基州：

两个男子试图把一个取款机的前盖打开。他们拿了一根链子，一头拴在取款机上，另一头拴在他们的小型货车的保险杠上。结果他们没有把取款机的前盖打开，却把保险杠从车上拉断了。他们感到很害怕，驾车离开了现场，逃回了家。那根链子留在了取款机上，而他们的保险杠还拴在链子上，车牌又连在保险杠上。

弗吉尼亚州：

两个男子开着一辆小货车到一幢刚刚竣工的房子里偷冰箱。他们把墙砸开，把地板砸烂……最后终于从这幢房子里偷了一台冰箱，并装上了货车。货车很快陷进了烂泥，这两个自作聪明的家伙认为冰箱太重了，于是又去砸墙，砸地板……终于把冰箱又放了回去，当他们返回货车的时候，却发现把车钥匙锁在了车里，最后只得弃车而逃。

地址不详：

一个男子走进一家银行，把20美元现金放在柜台上，要求兑换零钱。当营业员打开现金抽屉时，那个男子掏出一把手枪，要求把所有现金都放在柜台上。营业员立即照办。那个男子从营业员手中抓过现金，逃走了，柜台上仍放着他的那20美元。他从抽屉里拿了多少现金呢？15美元。