名篇背诵：Despair 绝望

Despair 绝望

玛格丽特·米切尔(Margaret Mitchell)

In the dull twilight of the winter afternoon she came to the end of the long road which had begun the night Atlanta fell. She had set her feet upon that road a spoiled, selfish and untried girl, full of youth, warm of emotion, easily bewildered by life. Now, at the end of the road, there was nothing left of that girl. Hunger and hard labor, fear and constant strain, the terrors of war and the terrors of Reconstruction had taken away all warmth and youth and softness. About the core of her being, a shell of hardness had formed and, little by little, layer by layer, the shell had thickened during the endless months.

But until this very day, two hopes had been left to sustain her. She had hoped that the war being over, life would gradually resume its old face. She had hoped that Ashley's return would bring back some meaning into life. Now both hopes were gone. The sight of Jonas Wilkerson in the front walk of Tara had made her realize that for her, for the whole South, the war would never end. The bitterest fighting, the most brutal retaliations , were just beginning. And Ashley was imprisoned forever by words which were stronger than any jail.

Peace had failed her and Ashley had failed her, both in the same day, and it was as if the last crevice in the shell had been sealed, the final layer hardened. She had become what Grandma Fontaine had counseled against, a woman who had seen the worst and so had nothing else to fear. Not life nor Mother nor loss of love nor public opinion. Only hunger and her nightmare dream of hunger could make her afraid.

- bewilder [bɪˈwɪldə] v. 迷惑，使为难

brutal retaliations 野蛮的报复

- counsel [ˈkaʊnsəl] v. 忠告，规劝

在冬季朦胧的暮色中，她来到了这条漫长道路的尽头，他动身上路的时候，正是亚特兰大城失陷的那个夜晚。她初登此路时，还是个矫情、自私、未经世面的闺秀，充满青春气息，热情洋溢，极易为生活的绚丽多彩迷惑。此时的她站在漫漫大路的尽头，昔日青春感念已化为乌有。内战与重建家园的双重恐怖卷走了她全部的热情、青春和温柔，剩下的只有饥饿、苦役、惧怕和压抑。在她心灵内核周围，形成了坚硬的外壳，随着无尽岁月的流逝，这层外壳，一点点、一层层，不断增厚。

但直到今天，还剩下两个希望支撑着她。她曾希望战争结束后，生活会逐渐恢复原样。她曾希望阿什利的归来会给生活带回一些意义。现在两个希望都破灭了。看到乔纳斯·威尔克逊走在开赴前线的队伍中的时候，当时她就意识到，对于她，对于整个南方，这场战争永远不会结束。最激烈的战斗，最残忍的报复，才刚刚开始。而阿什利永远被军令剥夺了自由，这种军令比任何监狱的禁令都森严强硬。

和平的实现与阿什利的归来，都未能如她所愿，两者又都发生在同一天。这就好像在禁锢她心灵的外壳上，能够渗透一线希望之光的罅隙弥合了，最后一层也变得坚硬了。方丹奶奶曾经劝诫她莫要成为“历尽万难天不怕”的女人，此刻她偏偏成了这么个女人。生活，母亲，爱情的丧失，公共舆论的责难，她已经全无顾忌。使她害怕的只有饥饿和挨饿的噩梦。

玛格丽特·米切尔(1900—1949)，美国南方女小说家，出生于佐治亚州亚特兰大城，其长篇小说《乱世佳人》(Gone with the Wind )(即《飘》)，名闻遐迩。这部小说于1936年出版，迅速风靡世界，成为20世纪最畅销的小说之一，并于1939年被改编为同名电影，获得了多个奥斯卡奖。除此之外，她并未完成其他长篇小说，但她的这部作品在文学界和广大读者中留下了深远的影响。